How to prevent my family member from leaving the house alone and putting themselves in danger?

My father-in-law has left the house twice without anyone noticing, once in the middle of the night. I'm terrified he'll get lost or hurt outside. What steps can I take to prevent this from happening again?

Knowing that a family member might leave home unannounced and without the ability to find their way back is one of the deepest fears for anyone caring for someone with dementia. The urge to "go home" or leave the house is a common behaviour at this stage, but the focus here isn't to stop that impulse — it's to make the house physically harder to leave unnoticed, and to prepare for if it happens anyway.

Why it's important to act early

A person with dementia who leaves home alone may not know their way back, may not recognise dangers like traffic or weather conditions, and may not be able to effectively ask for help. The first few hours are critical for a successful search, so prevention and preparation make all the difference.

Practical strategies

• Install door alarms or sensors: simple and affordable devices exist that emit a sound whenever an exterior door is opened, alerting the carer even at night.
• Use additional locks out of usual visual reach: a lock placed higher or lower than usual might be enough for the person not to find it, without preventing exit in an emergency (like a fire).
• Provide an identification bracelet: with their name, an emergency contact, and the indication "I have dementia", so anyone who finds them knows how to help.
• Consider a GPS tracker: discreet watches and devices are available that allow you to know their real-time location via a mobile app.
• Inform neighbours and local businesses: telling neighbours and the nearest shop or cafe that your family member has dementia creates a very effective informal surveillance network.
• Keep a recent photo accessible: save a current photo on your phone, useful for showing to the police or neighbours if you need to search for the person quickly.

"The door alarm was the best purchase we made. One night it went off at three in the morning and I managed to get to the door before he went outside, in his pyjamas, in winter."

What NOT to do

• Do not lock the person inside the house without an alarm or supervision — it's dangerous in an emergency and can be legally problematic.
• Do not assume that "it won't happen this time" after a first attempt to leave — it usually repeats.
• Do not delay placing identification because you think "it's not needed yet" — it's more effective to have prevention ready before the first serious episode.

When to seek professional help

If attempts to leave home are frequent or occur mainly at night, speak to their GP — it could be related to sundowning or sleep disturbances that have specific approaches. In case of disappearance, immediately contact the police via 999: in these situations, it is always considered an emergency, and the sooner the search begins, the greater the likelihood of a safe outcome.